Thwarted productivity - again!

Took the kids out for dinner last night to celebrate boy-child's good report card and girl-child's not failing but could have been a lot better report card. We got our favorite waiter at our local, regularly patronized family restaurant - yay. Nice meal, children generally well-behaved...as we're leaving our waiter asks, discreetly, "you feeling ok?". Stock answer, "yeah, just very tired". I'm not going to burden this lovely man with the litany of medical woes I deal with every day and the solitary parent of 2 very challenging kids with their own heaping basket of issues problems that tire me out as well. However, nice to know even an acquaintance recognizes how worn out I am and sweetly suggested that I go home and try to get some rest. I must really look like shit!

Looking like death warmed over aside, I tried to get to sleep earlier last night. Failed. Really wanted to finish the Hiyao Miyazaki DVD I've been trying to watch (The Wind Rises - watch it! touching, beautiful, complex, mature concepts - not for the kiddies for once, stunning, gorgeous...) so of course mom calls and wants to chat for a while. Today is late start day at school, so the kids can sleep an hour later. Perfect opportunity to get up early and get something accomplished. I dream of getting anything finished. This is my life. Constant interruption, too much to do, endless viral/bacterial assault most of the year, doctor's appointments for all of us at regular intervals, taking in a foster dog for a month who needs MAJOR WORK because he has a bite history, a high prey drive and high energy level(but is, thankfully, civilized - knows that we go potty outside, doesn't trash the house, which is good because he wrecked the crate, escaped the x-pen and figured out how to open the pocket doors, he can't be contained). He's a sweetie, but a major drool factory and a typical young, male Neo - he's an asshole.

So, where are we?...sleep deprived, virally invaded so feeling crappy from that, house is largely a disaster, get up early to try to clean up a bit. Let foster boy (FB) out, my dog does not rise at this ungodly hour and reclines on the bed for now, and I begin picking up the bathroom a bit. For some reason, not sure what, my son left one shoe there last night after his shower. FB has been licking the tub so it's all hairy and filthy, my son left the water dripping - thanks son, time for you to pay the water bill - but now FB is barking so, not wanting the neighbors to hate me, I run to let him in. In he trots and I return to the bathroom where he joins me. Then it hits my olfactory system! He has Poofoot! Dual Poofoot! Arghhhh!

For the unaware:
Poofoot: an affliction of Canis Domesticus in which the canid voids their bowels in an outdoor location then promptly trods through it causing clumps of feces to adhere to the foot, including between the toes (top and bottom surfaces),  void spaces of the nails and adjacent regions of the foot. Can present bilaterally and afflicts one to all feet. Usually seen in canids who are dim-witted, having GI disturbances and those who are just assholes. Also known as Pedal-Fecal Syndrome, Ugh,You'reSuchAnAsshole Syndrome and when the entire event occurs indoors is known as Whydoyouhateme-WhatdidIeverdotoyou.

Oh joy! I'm working with FB on his "if you touch my feet I will bite you issues" and now I have to deep clean 2 of them. The ruckus of cleaning up his very disgusting feet and the globs of poo he deposited all over the bathroom, of course, wakes the kids and arouses my formerly sleeping dog. So now I have the joyous task of trying to steam mop (note to Shark, you wanna sell the hell out of these things, market them directly to owners of Poofoot-prone dogs and well, all dog owners, this thing have saved my sanity soooooo many times) the entire width and most of the depth of this wretched little shack with one kid and 2 dogs in the way (other child isn't getting up, just bitching about being awakened). And I haven't had my coffee yet!! This may be a 3 cup day.

So, why do I share this festival of fun that is my life here? Well, I think if I don't vent and rant and get this stuff out of my system I will end up having a stroke or something. My kids alone may still give me a stroke or drive me over the edge or somehow completely void my warranty. So as an act of self-preservation I'm going to try writing a blog again. Maybe NO ONE will read it, that's fine. If there is someone out there reading this I hope it helps you feel less alone as a stressed-out parent or dog rescuer or you get a good laugh and just feel grateful that my life isn't yours. If you're so inclined, leave a comment. Welcome to the madness.